Olympic Sized Problems
by ProcrastinationPanda
Summary: England is gay and America isn't. Germany gets drunk and kisses Romano instead of Italy. Russia starts to like China, a little to much. This FanFiction may include the following: one happy couple, two crazy psychos, three couples total, four love triangles, and five Olympic rings. Side effects are, but not limited to, laughter, depression, excitement, and anger towards me .


**Ahead sorry for any misspellings or grammatical errors.**

"FANS OF AMERICA! WELCO-!"

"Bloody git! I should be welcoming everyone to the Olympic games! I am the host country."

"Da, I think so too England. Does America even have fans?"

"Hi, so um-."

"Ch, such immature countries. Japan, are you happy that I raised you to not be like that?"

"My hobbies are refraining from speaking and sensing the mood. The mood currently is hostile with the chance of setting fire to the rain."

"EVERYBODY SHUT UP! WE ARE TRYING TO INFORM THE PUBLIC ABOUT THE SUMMER OLYMPICS!"

"Veeeee... I think we should just take all (yawn) take a nice siesta. Hey Germany, can you wake me up when America stops talking? Goodnight everyone!"

"Ahon Ahon ahon have sweet dreams little Italy! I wish something or someone (ahon ahon) would shut him up. Any volunteers? Oh, then I guess I wi-."

"You stay the bloody hell away from him!"

"Hm? England are you volunteering?"

"Uh, guys... we're live..."

The nations all looked at the camera and saw that a little red light winked at them.

"Well ummm... Welcome to the 2012 Summer Olympics! I'm Arthur Kirkland. Myself and a few other nations will be PARTICIPATING 'America! Let go of the bloody microphone!' in the Olympics. Let's have some of them introduce themselves," said England as he let go of the microphone to America. Annoyed he motioned to an off camera staff member to bring him another mircophone.

"Yo! I'm America or Alfred Jones! Land of the free and home of the brave! I just wanted to say that we are going to kick all of you asses! Ch they should just giv-!" before America could finish his declaration England hit him on the back of the head. Rubbing his head he passed the mic to Russia, who smiled. The cameraman started to shiver causing the camera to vibrate.

"Can you not hold the camera still? Hmm maybe if I hit you like I do my alarm you'll stop moving?" With that the cameraman froze. "I am mother Russia! But you may call me Ivan Braginski," said Russia who passed over Canada and gave the mic to China. As their hands touched China felt instant sympathy for the cameraman, who was mysteriously replaced by another person.

"Hello, my name is China. My full name is Wang Yao. I am very impressed with the layout. If you remember I held the honor of hosting the last summer Olympics." China smiled at the camera and handed the microphone to Japan.

"Arigato, China-san. I am Japan it is a honor that I was able to be selected to participate. I hope that no one gets hurt. Oh, my complete name is Kiku Honda." Japan respectfully gave the mic to Germany who stood up.

"I am Germany otherwise known as Ludwig- BROTHER! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?" yelled Germany who made anyone with headphones instantly filled with regret.

"I am awesome Prussia! See my face kneel down un cry at the sheer awesomeness of Gilbert Weillschmidt! Hm? West why are you so red?" Germany started to shake Prussia violently. The mic fell and hit Italy on the head. A large bump soon formed.

"Pasta! Oh it's my turn then eh? *whispering* 'Hey Germany what are we doing?'" asked Italy as he rubbed his head. Germany mouthed "Introduction". "Okay then here I go! So my name is a Feliciano Vargas! I'm Italy!" A woman motioned Italy to pass the mic to France who currently was examining his hair... "You're kinda pretty! When do you get off work? I bet it's the same time I do! Why don't we go out and have some pasta!" While he said this France gently pulled the mic from his hands.

"Ah, Italy. I'm so proud of you. Bonjour, I am the gorgeous country known as France. Ah France mi amour! To all of you mademoiselles you may call me Francis Bonnefoy. I am sure if you would like we could arrange a secret meeting and do some-." France blew a kiss to the cameraman who felt his heart race. England motioned the woman to cut the microphone before they would have to change the age rating.

"Give me the mic before we have to replace any more cameramen! Ehem, now getting back to what I was saying. Welcome to the Olympics! I hope you enjoy them as much as we are! Good luck to all the participants!" said England as he waved at the camera. Soon the commercials started to roll. England sighed as he and the other countries started to get up and stretch. America was standing in front of T.V.

"Hahahaha! Awesome commercials Iggy, put a hot chick and an American flag and maybe they'll be as sweet as mine." America slapped England on the back. England seemed annoyed by overly common American gesture. France licked his lips at the newly, again, replaced cameraman.

"Hi, is it my turn now? Hi I'm Canada, if you don't remember me plesae think of the last winter Olympics. I hosted them." As Canada continued to talk to a camera, which was not on, Prussia waved goodbye to Germany as he walked out to annoy Austria and Hungary more. Italy patted Germany on the head and soon fell asleep. China ran around the room trying to avoid Russia at all costs.

"Oh China, I am very looking forward to seeing you in a swim clothes," said Russia as he walked menacingly fast towards the Asian country. Japan checked the time.

"Umm you guys is this camera even on?" asked Canada. The cameraman shook his head as Canada sighed and sat down.

After some time the broad casting was done. England showed America the weight room after grabbing a bite to eat.

"So this is the weight room feel free to use it," said England as America looked at all of the new equipment. "It wouldn't hurt you if you wanted to use it."

"Dude! I get it! You think I'm fat! Ch, I was going to surprise you tomorrow, but oh well." America started to take off his suit. England blushed intensely as he saw that America had little to no fat on his body.

"America, steroids are not allowed."

"Relax man, heroes don't cheat. What you see 100% grade A beef. You can feel for yourself if you don't believe me." America grabbed the blushing nation's hand and moved it about his skin.

"I get it! You don't have to show off!" said England as he pulled his hand away.

"Come on let me see your body!" said America as he started to pull on England's clothing. Suddenly a camera clicked. Soon cameras starting clicking and flashing all around them.

"Hey you two! Why don't you give me a good one?" shouted a paparazzi as his camera started to click.

"Hey Artie why don't you give him a little peck on the cheek?" shouted another.

"Hey Iggy, they think we're getting it on! Let me clear up the misunderstanding. I AM NOT GAY NOR DO I LIKE ENGLAND THAT WAY SO WHY DON'T YOU GO HOME?" said America as he walked over and broke a camera with his bare hands.

"Hey America why don't you do that to England's balls?" said the paparazzi as she brought out another camera to replace the other one.

"Where are the security?" shouted England as he pulled America and pushed through the sea of paparazzi, with himself on the verge of tears.

"Please leave my comrades alone. I would like them to be in perfect shape so that way I can have good competition. If you do not, me and my pipe will have something to say to you and your cameras," bellowed Russia as China continued to break the cameras. Soon all the cameras paused before snapping photos of Russia and China.

"Hey girly can you me a little wink?" said a random Paparazzi. Russia's smile vanished. He walked in front of China. All of the smart people gave him a wide path.

"Why don't you run along before you can't?" said Russia as he patted his pipe. In the meantime America and England got away from the crowd. They soon called a cab and drove to the hotel. China and Russia were left with the sea of cameras. Soon the police came and drove the paparazzi back with batons and guns.

"Thank you Russia. I couldn't have done that with out you. Here, this is for you." China checked his pockets to see if it was there. China gave Russia a little panda keychain. Russia blushed and smiled. He pulled China into a big and suffocating hug. This was only a fraction of how grateful Russia was, after all this was the first present he ever got. The scarf was more like a trade.

"China, thank you so much. Я так тебя люблю!" Russia finally let go and fumbled around until he found his phone. He put the keychain on. "It will stay here forever. I shall name it Yao after you."

"Umm, I'm going to go now. See you later." China excused himself as he called a cab and went back to his and Japan's room.

Back at the news casting room Italy and the woman talked. Japan was at the hotel, he had excused himself because of the extreme jet lag. Germany waited for Italy to stop talking with the woman. After two hours Germany tapped Italy.

"Hey, I'm going back to the hotel now. Can you find your way back from here?"

"Oh yeah sure Germany! See you later! So anyways I was-," said Italy as he continued talking to the woman.

Germany's phone rang, it was Prussia.

"West! Let's go drinking! I want to try one of these not as awesome taverns here! I'll text you the place see you there!" a loud beep then nothing.

"Fine, maybe he can help me."

Germany called a cab and soon found himself at the tavern. Prussia had already got a round.

"West! Hmm, you do not look awesome. What is wrong?"

"Well, I don't really know what to do. It's Italy."

"Again? Hahaha! When is it not about him?"

"Ja, but this time it's different I'm afraid."

"Ha?"

"I saw him talking to that woman even after I told him I was leaving."

"Odd, normally he follows you around like a little puppy."

"Ja, when he didn't leave with me mein chest started to ache."

"Oh, oooh! Looks like West finally got the hots for Italy! Wait waht! West! You aren't gay!"

"I know I know. It's odd. I just feel weird."

After drinking till they were drunk Germany with his fleeting consciousness called a cab for Prussia then him. When he arrived at the hotel he stumbled until he got to his and Italy's room. After finding the door unlocked he fell on the floor.

"Hey you stupid German potato eater! Get off the floor before Feli falls on you. Hey!" said Romano as he poked the German.

Germany still in a daze grabbed Romano's face causing the Italian to blush. Germany pulled Romano into a kiss meant for his brother. Romano's fist fell as he kissed the German back.

"Hey Roma! Spain and I heard a loud thud, is everything-GERMANY!" screamed Italy.

**Why did Romano kiss Germany back? Does China fully know what he got himself into when he gave the keychain? Did America notice England's tears? Comment/Review your **

**opinions and guesses. Alert to be one of the first to know the answers to these questions.**

**Я так тебя люблю! – I love you so much!**

**A note: So yeah, sorry if it was hard to understand. Review and tell me if it was. Anyways, the scene and it seems that this year's Olympics will have more than just athletic games. I will do each sport so look forward to it or don't and hurt my feelings. :D see you soon! **


End file.
